It’s one of those evenings I know I should & need to retire for the evening & the sanity of myself, but here I am.
So it was one of those days that what I packed myself for lunch & wasn’t going to cut it – Tuna. If someone had phoned my bat cave of a room at school & said, “Hey…we’re going Taco Bell, do you want something?”, my response would’ve been, “Yea, I’ll take a Spicy Chicken Crunch Wrap Supreme w/ a super size diet coke, thanks.” Although this didn’t occur, I was very capable today of totally ignoring my nutrition standards and ate whatever I wanted. It was like I was saying f*** you to myself and all the hard work I’ve put in so far. I realize tomorrow is another day, and as Dave pointed out at when I went off the deep end (breadwise) it was only sourdough bread, which is low on the glycemic index of foods. Although I appreciate him putting a positive spin this, I don’t think chocolate covered cinnamon bears are on that index.
Now I’m not ranting to have people respond by relating to me & telling me they’ve been through it (not to sound insensitive or anything). I believe I’m ranting because one of the biggest challenges for me is when I mess up, that I don’t have a complete breakdown & thus I’ve decided live by Ralph Waldo Emerson’s motto tonight:
“Finish each day & be done with it. You have done what you could. Some blunders and absurdities have crept in; forget them as soon as you can. Tomorrow is a new day. You shall begin it serenely & with too high a spirit to be encumbered with your old nonsense.”